Annette Bening, Born: 29 May 1958, Topeka, Kansas, USA

If you're an actor, you have to find a way to make peace with all the media attention.

And if there's anything movies can do in a way that I just love, and I love as an audience is, "Show...Show more »

And if there's anything movies can do in a way that I just love, and I love as an audience is, "Show me something I don't know about. Show me something I haven't seen.". Show less «

I think people have a right to their point of view.

Five billion people have played Hamlet. "To be or not to be". And how do you do that and find your w...Show more »

Five billion people have played Hamlet. "To be or not to be". And how do you do that and find your way into your own journey, your own way of telling it? Show less «

We all perform our lives in a way. And the actor is a perfect metaphor to get at that theme of "how ...Show more »

We all perform our lives in a way. And the actor is a perfect metaphor to get at that theme of "how do we find our authentic selves?". And that we all - whether we're actors or not - perform ourselves. As a way of searching. As a way of fumbling around and trying to say, is this my voice? Is this who I am? Show less «

The time I spend with my kids informs every fiber of who I am.

I like things that I feel comfortable in.

I feel really lucky that I'm able to pursue the work that I love. I want my children to see that. I ...Show more »

I feel really lucky that I'm able to pursue the work that I love. I want my children to see that. I want them to have that for themselves, something that they love, that they do, that they pursue in their lives as a way of growing and learning. Show less «

There are so many different kinds of relationships, so it's sort of difficult to define what is cons...Show more »

There are so many different kinds of relationships, so it's sort of difficult to define what is considered normal. Show less «

Sometimes you're reading something, and you don't know it will be important in your life. You're rea...Show more »

Sometimes you're reading something, and you don't know it will be important in your life. You're reading this script, and you start to get involved. It's not an intellectual experience. Show less «

Everybody has a public life, and they have their own private life. Everybody has their secrets. Ever...Show more »

Everybody has a public life, and they have their own private life. Everybody has their secrets. Everybody has their own private, you know, agonies as well as joys. And that's what great drama, whether it's the movies or the theater, that's what it shows. Show less «

I think where I've instinctively found myself is that I am somewhat guarded in my public life. Being...Show more »

I think where I've instinctively found myself is that I am somewhat guarded in my public life. Being interviewed or being photographed or just in public attention I have a certain reserve. But when I'm working I feel like I'm very open. At least I like to believe that I feel like nothing is held back when I'm in front of a camera. That's my job. Show less «

I knew I wanted children in my life. The acting was always in relation to it. Life at home is chaos....Show more »

I knew I wanted children in my life. The acting was always in relation to it. Life at home is chaos. They're wonderful. They're such interesting human beings. I just love it. I'm lucky. Show less «

I'm certainly not a perfect mother, but I am an avid mother, let me put it that way.

I find the reality of our emotional lives interesting.

I like that I've been through things, that when something happens, it resonates with something that ...Show more »

I like that I've been through things, that when something happens, it resonates with something that already happened. It's not that things like loss are more or less painful. But they're deeper. I find that fascinating. Show less «

I am really looking forward as I get older and older, to being less and less nice.

It used to be the one or the other, right? You were the 'bad girl' or the 'good girl' or the 'bad mo...Show more »

It used to be the one or the other, right? You were the 'bad girl' or the 'good girl' or the 'bad mother' or 'the good mother,' 'the horrible businesswoman who eschewed her children' or 'the earth mother who was happy to be at home baking pies,' all of that stuff that we sort of knew was a lie. Show less «

I didn't do a movie until I was almost 30. I'm grateful for that because it gave me a chance to be a...Show more »

I didn't do a movie until I was almost 30. I'm grateful for that because it gave me a chance to be an adult in the world and do work in the regional theater that very few people cared about. I loved it and I wanted to do that stuff. Show less «

I think for all of us, as we age, there are always a few moments when you are shocked.

What makes us love a character is a character that tries.

My mother is not somebody who's troubled by aging.

It's easier to see in someone else, another actor, how they kind of disappear and then this other pe...Show more »

It's easier to see in someone else, another actor, how they kind of disappear and then this other persona appears. A great actor is a thing of mystery. Show less «

To me, I didn't think of acting as being a young thing only.

We still want to idealize moms, and sometimes we want to idealize actresses who are moms, too. I kno...Show more »

We still want to idealize moms, and sometimes we want to idealize actresses who are moms, too. I know that's something I've experienced, but we're all just doing the best we can and we're all trying to raise our kids and talk to them about everything that needs to be discussed. Show less «

I don't really have a choice. I'm getting older.

I think you sort of shed skins as you go along in life. You get into your 40s, and you feel like "Ok...Show more »

I think you sort of shed skins as you go along in life. You get into your 40s, and you feel like "Okay, no more pretending." You get to just be who you are. Show less «

Anyone who is drawn in broad strokes either negatively or positively is generally not very interesti...Show more »

Anyone who is drawn in broad strokes either negatively or positively is generally not very interesting to play. Show less «

The tension I feel is the moment they say, "Action!". Movies are like lightning in a bottle, and you...Show more »

The tension I feel is the moment they say, "Action!". Movies are like lightning in a bottle, and you always want to find when you possibly can catch a surprising moment. Show less «

[on Valmont (1989)] Milos Forman is one of the great directors alive. He was incredible. I learned s...Show more »

[on Valmont (1989)] Milos Forman is one of the great directors alive. He was incredible. I learned so much from him. I was working in New York on a play and I auditioned for Milos over a series of months. So it took a long time. I had only done one film before that. And so it was a long process. I read with all kinds of different people. I read with Val Kilmer and Kevin Spacey. So when I got this part, I'm playing this French aristocrat. I had never been to Europe. I mean this was such a dream come true to do this film with Milos Forman, this beautiful big period movie. And Milos taught me so much about acting. Because he's Czech and he doesn't have the politesse that some American directors have - he's much more blunt; he was an excellent acting teacher to me. And we all were sort of traumatized by working with Milos because he was so tough on us. And Colin (Firth) was also new. He'd done a few more movies than I had, but he was also new. And so we would start doing the scenes and we're in these period costumes and everything. So we would be sort of stiff. And so if I was to say something to you like, "Would you like a cup of tea?" Milos would say "No, no, no, no, no." And then he would make fun of the way that you said it - "would you like a cup of tea?" (exaggerated). And then he would say, "Natural, natural, just 'would you like a cup of tea?'" Then he would do it. And he was right. He was right and I learned a lot. I got used to it, and began to ask him to do that, and would say 'Show me what you mean.' He's incredibly loyal, and funny, and I adore him. Show less «

Having a life outside of movies is like pure oxygen. It makes the work more precious and informed.

I think what's interesting about the whole paparazzi thing is that unless you're Brad Pitt or Madonn...Show more »

I think what's interesting about the whole paparazzi thing is that unless you're Brad Pitt or Madonna, you can pretty much avoid it. You know when you're going to an opening that you will be photographed, so that's fine. And you know the restaurants that have paparazzi, so you don't go to them. Show less «

Yes, I know I've played these women, but I'm not really conniving at all.

It's kind of a mystery to me, as far as my own life experiences and what I've witnessed - why some p...Show more »

It's kind of a mystery to me, as far as my own life experiences and what I've witnessed - why some people can just move on through traumatic experiences, in childhood particularly, and why other people are just paralyzed by it. I just don't know how and why that is. Show less «

I do have to take care of myself, not only because I'm in the movies, just for mental health reasons...Show more »

I do have to take care of myself, not only because I'm in the movies, just for mental health reasons. I exercise for me. You know, maybe it would be nice to not have to do that in order to feel good, but I do. I feel like I have to, to feel good. To clear my head and all of that, so. Show less «

Acting is not about being famous, it's about exploring the human soul.

Anybody who has children and children who are well feels a sense of responsibility towards parents a...Show more »

Anybody who has children and children who are well feels a sense of responsibility towards parents and kids and families that are struggling and that aren't well. Show less «

I always wonder about people's history and their lives, especially people that are a little bit more...Show more »

I always wonder about people's history and their lives, especially people that are a little bit more distant, who obviously have had some kind of a thing, and you know there's some reason why they're not able to connect. It's not because they don't want to. They don't have the ability. Show less «

Our children see us a certain way, and we want to be seen by them in a certain way. I certainly want...Show more »

Our children see us a certain way, and we want to be seen by them in a certain way. I certainly want to be a strong, stable, loving, consistent presence in my children's lives. But we are human beings, too. Show less «

To me idealized characters are so boring to play, especially having grown up in the classical theate...Show more »

To me idealized characters are so boring to play, especially having grown up in the classical theater. That's a great experience, but as a woman, especially, you've played a lot of idealized characters. So when you've got someone who has weaknesses as well as strengths, that's interesting. Show less «

I've always been pretty levelheaded. In show business, you need to have a certain internal stability...Show more »

I've always been pretty levelheaded. In show business, you need to have a certain internal stability. Show less «

When I started, I was a theater actress, and there were roles that I couldn't imagine not playing, l...Show more »

When I started, I was a theater actress, and there were roles that I couldn't imagine not playing, like Rosalind in "As You Like It". I used to think I would die if I could play that. But then I started doing movies, and I had children, and I moved to Los Angeles. And now I kind of can't remember what those roles would be. Show less «

I had never been attracted to younger guys. I had, from my late teens, always liked men who were old...Show more »

I had never been attracted to younger guys. I had, from my late teens, always liked men who were older than me. Show less «

There's so much of our psychological makeup which is impermissible for us to explore because it's in...Show more »

There's so much of our psychological makeup which is impermissible for us to explore because it's inappropriate or perverse or scary. I'm interested in exploring that in myself. I try to be honest with myself about everything that I feel. I'm not saying I'm able to do that all the time, but it's something I'm interested in. Show less «

I think in the past, around the time that method acting became so prevalent, it used to be that Amer...Show more »

I think in the past, around the time that method acting became so prevalent, it used to be that American actors were thought to be the kind that would work more from the inside out, and that the English actors worked more from the outside in. Show less «

I have perfected the art of putting my feet on my husband's lap during awards ceremonies so he can r...Show more »

I have perfected the art of putting my feet on my husband's lap during awards ceremonies so he can rub them. Show less «

I saw a Shakespeare play when I was - I guess I was in junior high. And I just fell in love with the...Show more »

I saw a Shakespeare play when I was - I guess I was in junior high. And I just fell in love with the theater because, for me, it was a combination of big ideas and feeling. Show less «

My husband and I have very similar backgrounds even though we're years apart. So there are a lot of ...Show more »

My husband and I have very similar backgrounds even though we're years apart. So there are a lot of things that we basically share. Show less «

I'm lucky: almost all my family has lived to be very old. I have one grandfather who lived to be 100...Show more »

I'm lucky: almost all my family has lived to be very old. I have one grandfather who lived to be 100. Show less «

I love the craft of acting, I love learning, I love everything that comes with the new project; the ...Show more »

I love the craft of acting, I love learning, I love everything that comes with the new project; the whole process is totally intoxicating to me. Show less «

I'm interested in writing that explores all sides of human beings.

I never felt like I had made it.

I've played parts that were just likable people, and there's a certain pleasure in that. And that's ...Show more »

I've played parts that were just likable people, and there's a certain pleasure in that. And that's that. Show less «

My sister and I fought a lot when we were kids. I was the little bratty sister, and she would kind o...Show more »

My sister and I fought a lot when we were kids. I was the little bratty sister, and she would kind of walk away, not wanting to be associated with me. Show less «

When I look at women, older than I am, in their 50s, 60, 70s, 80s, and I see women that I admire, I ...Show more »

When I look at women, older than I am, in their 50s, 60, 70s, 80s, and I see women that I admire, I think, "Oh, I get it; that's how I'm going to be." I'm not scared. I want to be that. Show less «

I wanted to be a classical actress. I plodded along. I went to junior college in San Francisco, I wa...Show more »

I wanted to be a classical actress. I plodded along. I went to junior college in San Francisco, I was in a Repertory Company. My hero was Eva Le Gallienne, who was a great theater actress at the turn of the century who created her own company, and she wrote these hilarious autobiographies at the time. Show less «

Find the story you want to tell. If you don't want to write it, find somebody to write it.

Getting all dressed up and putting on fancy clothes - all of that's a great thing, but oddly, it doe...Show more »

Getting all dressed up and putting on fancy clothes - all of that's a great thing, but oddly, it doesn't really have a lot to do with acting most of the time. Show less «

I never thought my private life would be newsworthy.

When I watch my kids, and I see the primal level at which the sibling relationships are formed, then...Show more »

When I watch my kids, and I see the primal level at which the sibling relationships are formed, then I completely understand what these unresolved adult sibling problems are based on. You know, "Mom liked you better" and, "You got your own room and I didn't". Show less «

I think when you're at your best as an actor, it is cathartic.

When I started in the theater, I'd do plays by Shakespeare or Ibsen or Chekhov, and they all created...Show more »

When I started in the theater, I'd do plays by Shakespeare or Ibsen or Chekhov, and they all created great women's roles. Show less «

I feel very lucky I don't have to be a critic.

With movies, so much of it is, "Who is the human being that is going to be directing it?". Because i...Show more »

With movies, so much of it is, "Who is the human being that is going to be directing it?". Because it is their medium. In a way, you are serving the director, and when it is someone that you feel you can have a lot of confidence in, it can make a big difference. Show less «

I feel that certain things are best kept inside a family and not discussed with anyone else.

Every person's opinion, in a way, does matter.

Even with a stable character, you want something surprising to happen, hopefully because that's what...Show more »

Even with a stable character, you want something surprising to happen, hopefully because that's what the camera loves the most. That's what is great about film. Show less «

Most people are looking for something to give their life meaning.

I remember hearing someone say that good acting is more about taking off a mask than putting one on,...Show more »

I remember hearing someone say that good acting is more about taking off a mask than putting one on, and in movie acting, certainly that's true. With the camera so close, you can see right down into your soul, hopefully. So being able to do that in a way is terrifying, and in another way, truly liberating. And I like that about it. Show less «

If anything, I want to please people too much.

I've made some movies that I really loved that nobody saw.

I am in awe of Ruth Draper.

There's no question that you can explore aspects of yourself through roles that you play, and you ge...Show more »

There's no question that you can explore aspects of yourself through roles that you play, and you get a chance to investigate yourself; that's healthy, and it's therapeutic in a way. But if you're indulging yourself, exploration at the cost of the story or the project, that's not good. Show less «

I read "Game Change". If you want to relive the campaign, that book is unbelievable. It's great. It'...Show more »

I read "Game Change". If you want to relive the campaign, that book is unbelievable. It's great. It's the book of that campaign. It brought all the memories back of everything with Clinton and Obama, and Sarah Palin and McCain, and choosing her, and John Edwards. It was an interesting book. Show less «

We all get lost along the way, but hopefully we figure out some sort of path. It helps if you can im...Show more »

We all get lost along the way, but hopefully we figure out some sort of path. It helps if you can imagine the process as well as the goal. Those kinds of dreams are easier to achieve. Show less «

The movie business is tough. It's driven by economics and economics are about trying to get a lot of...Show more »

The movie business is tough. It's driven by economics and economics are about trying to get a lot of people into the theater. That's the reality of the business, the culture we're in. Show less «

I act, but I am a mother first and wife second.

[on working with Michel Hazanavicius in The Search (2014)] I knew The Artist (2011) of course, shot ...Show more »

[on working with Michel Hazanavicius in The Search (2014)] I knew The Artist (2011) of course, shot in L.A. It's a marvelous film. I was very impressed when I learned the director was preparing such a different film. It's very brave of Michel to have taken the time to throw himself into such a project. Michel is very direct, unpretentious. It's very easy to communicate with him, as it is with Bérénice [Bejo]. Both are professionals who, like me, also like to have fun. Even during the most serious moments there's always a place for laughter. They have a real love of life and a great curiosity towards the world. Me too. We had some excellent times together. I was delighted to be part of such an important film. Show less «

A lot of directors in my experience are very receptive. They see what you do first, and then they wa...Show more »

A lot of directors in my experience are very receptive. They see what you do first, and then they want to find a place to put the camera, and they tweak you here and there. Show less «

There's love for your parents, your family, your spouse, your partner, your friends, but the nature ...Show more »

There's love for your parents, your family, your spouse, your partner, your friends, but the nature of the connection you have with your child, there's nothing like it. It has its own character and it's so serious and so powerful, and so it's a prism through which I see everything. Show less «

I don't see myself as competing with other actresses. I mean, I went through a time when I was in Ne...Show more »

I don't see myself as competing with other actresses. I mean, I went through a time when I was in New York, and I was going to lots of auditions and trying to get parts, but even then, you're not really competing with the other actresses. There is a competition going on, but it's not like something you can win in that way. Show less «

I don't see myself as having to compete with younger actresses; I don't feel that.

Right now, I love the fact that I have so many opportunities, but I know this privileged position ca...Show more »

Right now, I love the fact that I have so many opportunities, but I know this privileged position cannot last. That doesn't mean that I'll stop working. I picture myself as an old actress doing cameos in films with people saying: "Isn't that that Bening woman?". Show less «

By the time I was in high school, Roe v. Wade had passed, so that was also happening; girls were get...Show more »

By the time I was in high school, Roe v. Wade had passed, so that was also happening; girls were getting pregnant and getting abortions - and that happened in my school too. Show less «

My dad was in the life insurance business, so I learned about selling when I was about 14 because I ...Show more »

My dad was in the life insurance business, so I learned about selling when I was about 14 because I started working as a secretary. Show less «

My character in Running with Scissors (2006) is manic-depressive. She starts out as a wonderfully ec...Show more »

My character in Running with Scissors (2006) is manic-depressive. She starts out as a wonderfully eccentric person, and then descends into a terrible illness. Show less «

I feel very, very lucky to have come from the family I did. We have our dysfunctions and our problem...Show more »

I feel very, very lucky to have come from the family I did. We have our dysfunctions and our problems, just like any family. But my parents are extremely loving people. Show less «

I never speak for my husband, and I never speak for my children. It's a rule. Believe me, it is.

I'm still very critical of myself in film.

I love being busy, and I love having a lot going on; it's exciting.

Glamour is really fun.

What really motivates you to try to work things out as an actor is in large part fear, because you w...Show more »

What really motivates you to try to work things out as an actor is in large part fear, because you want to get into that narrative and bring the audience along. Show less «

It's hard to make a living in this business. Unions aren't as strong as they used to be. For a journ...Show more »

It's hard to make a living in this business. Unions aren't as strong as they used to be. For a journeyman actor - someone who doesn't have a famous name but has consistent work in theater or film or television - it has become harder to get through, harder to raise a family. Show less «

Somebody said something really smart: It's like you end up being the defense attorney for your role....Show more »

Somebody said something really smart: It's like you end up being the defense attorney for your role. Your job is to defend their point of view. You're fighting for what they want. You learn that in acting school - it's Acting 1A: "What do you want? What's in the way?". Show less «

I've tried to take roles with great demands.

I just want to be educated.

Critics have a responsibility to put things in a cultural and sociological or political context. Tha...Show more »

Critics have a responsibility to put things in a cultural and sociological or political context. That is important. Show less «

I love the luxury of the camera. The camera does so much for you. I like the secrets a camera can te...Show more »

I love the luxury of the camera. The camera does so much for you. I like the secrets a camera can tell. Show less «

I still remember the five points of salesmanship: attention, interest, conviction, desire and close.

If you can open people's hearts first, then maybe people's minds get opened after that.

I didn't picture myself as a movie actress. I began to think about it around college. I remember thi...Show more »

I didn't picture myself as a movie actress. I began to think about it around college. I remember thinking, "Well somebody has to be in them", so maybe I could do that eventually. It's all been a surprise. Show less «

It's always 'busy' with four children; it's chaos.

I think we as celebrities have a lot more control.

I have huge chunks of time when I'm not working.

My parents were very supportive. They went to every show. And they never told me not to do what I wa...Show more »

My parents were very supportive. They went to every show. And they never told me not to do what I was doing. Show less «

Most women would say they relate to 'Hedda Gabler' - there's a part of her in them. Ibsen was writin...Show more »

Most women would say they relate to 'Hedda Gabler' - there's a part of her in them. Ibsen was writing about a deep ambivalence that many women feel about domesticity. I think about myself and friends of mine - we have some of Hedda's qualities and traits. Show less «